Monitoring Your Child’s Facebook Page

Does your child have a Facebook page? Do you ever look at it?

I look at A’s page at least once a day. I look at her status, as well as what everyone else is posting on her page. I am Facebook friends with most of her friends. My best friends are friends with A so they can keep an eye out too. In fact, when I allowed her to get a page, I required that she be friends with me and my two besties. Some might call this spying but I call it being a good parent. She is very aware that we all check her page and pay attention to what her friends are saying.

Over the weekend I noticed that a middle school girl, who we don’t know because she goes to a local Catholic school instead of my daughter’s school, was cussing up a storm on one of A’s classmate’s pages.  M, the classmate, knows the cussing girl who we will refer to as K. She was using every word you can imagine. She was referring to M’s classmates. It was obvious that she was jealous that M had other friends. M asked her to stop but she continued to use the F word and refer to M’s friends as the B word. Another mom actually commented basically asking the girl to clean up her language. Instead, the girl started making inappropriate comments about the mom. Another friend of M’s, L, also asked the girl to stop and said K was being rude. That just made K go off even more. The last time I checked, there were 72 comments on this post, most of them made by K and including very inappropriate language. M also used a few choice words but never used them to call someone a name. It was still inappropriate though considering she is only in the seventh grade and Facebook is a public forum.

As I read this, all I could think is “where are their parents?” I would be mortified if I ever found out my daughter talked like this but to put it on Facebook, out in public for everyone to see, would probably send me to the bottom of a wine bottle! What was amazing to me is this went on for at least 24 hours and no one, other than the mom of a friend, ever stepped in. How did their mothers not see this? I would have seen it within the first few hours or heard from one of my friends. I would have immediately deleted the posts (yes, I have her password), made her delete K, the foul mouth friend, and then called K’s mom. These posts are still up as I write this. I don’t want to harshly judge another parent because I believe we all do the best we can but this really bothers me.

Do you monitor your child’s Facebook? What about their text messages? How would you have handled this situation if your child was involved? Do you think I should have stepped in even though I don’t know K at all and barely know M? I want to hear your thoughts!

 

Makeovers for Mom and Daughter

So we did it. The Girl Scout moms and I took our kids to Bare Escentuals for mommy/daughter makeovers. We all learned about individual skincare needs, picking the best colors for our skin tone and how to apply it properly.

The consultants actually put more makeup on all of us than we would normally wear but they gave the girls a very subtle and natural look. Alexis did mine and A’s makeup. She taught A how to deal with blemishes, wash her skin properly and apply eyeliner and mascara without giving herself the “raccoon” look. Alexis did one half of Andi’s face and then had her do the other half in order to make sure she knew how to apply the makeup. She also taught her some tricks with the mirror to help apply it correctly.

I even learned a few things about skin care. I was very interested in eye moisturizer and firmer since I am getting a little older. Alexis introduced to me to a good product and taught me how to apply it. She also did my makeup. I liked the Bare Minerals foundation and primer she used. The mascara seems like it won’t clump easily. The eye shadow and eye line went on easily BUT I did feel a little overdone when I left with plum, teal and beige eyelids and a dark shadowy eyeliner. My children were even a little embarrassed to go to Target with me and friends made some sort of funny but not so nice jokes about where I should be working. Everyone is just used to seeing me in very natural colors. However, the product itself seemed great.

I ended purchasing quite a bit of product for A that will be considered a large part of her Christmas. It wasn’t cheap but the all of the products will last her anywhere from three months to a year. Plus, they are all natural so I shouldn’t have to worry about the makeup breaking out her skin. I also won’t have to buy her moisturizer or face wash for a long time.

I did buy quite a bit for myself as well. I decided against the strawberries and cream lipstick and gloss. I just didn’t like the color but wow that lipstick stayed on through dinner, a glass of wine washing my face and even sleeping!

The girls and moms had a blast. Alexis and the rest of the Bare Escentuals crew were very welcoming. The makeovers themselves were free. Although we all did buy product, none of us felt pressured to. I definitely recomm

end doing this as a mother/daughter outing or even for you and a few friends.

Feel free to ask me any questions about our experience. I’d love to hear about your experiences with makeovers and other products as well!

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Giving Them Freedom is Giving Me Chest Pains

A, my 12-year-old daughter, has been going to the football games with her friends for a couple years now. In fifth grade I knew all the girls stayed together and I lived across the street so I could be there quickly if needed. Sixth grade came and went without too much worry.

Now seventh grade… A’s friend, P, arrived to our house an hour before the game Friday night. They spent the entire time primping. As they come down the stairs I notice that their hair is no longer in ponytails. Instead it’s straightened and styled. A was wearing mascara while P fashioned full eye makeup, a little too much if you ask me. They both wore their tall brown stylish boots and had selected their outfits very carefully.

I was driving A and P to the game when P got a phone call. It was obviously a boy. She was giddy and even blushing.  They were deciding where to meet at the game. I suddenly realized my daughter wasn’t going to the game with just P. There would be boys there. Boys who want to hang out with them. Boys who might like them. Boys who obviously like P. I’ve known P since she was 7 and her mom and I are good friends. I wanted to turn the car around. I didn’t.  Instead, I blurted out… No kissing boys at the game! I immediately heard “mommmmmmmm!” in a high pitch squeaky voice from my daughter and “I didn’t plan on it” in a very calm voice from P. I don’t think I believed P at that point.

I pull up to the school (which I no longer live across the street from) and remind them to stay together, not to talk to strangers, keep their cell phones on and to meet me promptly at 9:15. I see their eyes roll because they have heard this spiel from me at least 100 times.

I realize they were at a school function but do you remember middle school? Do you remember how high school kids treated middle school kids? Do you remember how mean girls can be and how ‘smooth’ boys can be? I let them out of the car and just hope I have given them the right tools to make the right decisions.

I wish they just wanted to stay home with mom and watch a movie or play a board game. Ah, those were the days!

Getting Started

First day of 7th and 4th grade

My 12-year-old daughter A is probably going to be upset when she finds out about this blog so let me start by apologizing to her. Sorry hon. Now that we got that over with, I’ll get started by telling you a little about me.

My name is Gina Holt. I have two children who we will call A, my 12-year-old daughter, and J, my almost 10-year-old son. I’ve been a single mom for 8 years now, which does make raising two tweens a little more challenging I think. Thank goodness their dad is just a phone call and 30 miles away.

I wrote for several local publications for 10 years. I have covered topics like 9-11, the Erpenbeck Scandal, the deer hunting issue in Fort Thomas, politics and much more for the Community Press, The Enquirer and The Kentucky Post. I have written about the restaurant industry for Prep Magazine, Northern Kentucky festivals for Kentucky Monthly and my favorite… family and kid issues for Cincinnati Family Magazine.

I am now the public relations coordinator for the Kenton County Public Library. I love my job but I miss writing about family events, medical issues, my kids, etc… So here we go.

My plan is to write about the funny stuff my kids do as well as some of the issues we take on socially, medically, etc. You will quickly discover that my children have had a lot of health issues over the years, that my life revolves around my daughter’s soccer schedule and that my son is a genius who can’t find his shoes as he trips over them. You will also find out that I love my children more than anything but wine and good food is how I stay sane.

Feel free to comment, tell stories about your own kids, ask questions, etc… I hope you enjoy!